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Mamaw and Milkshakes
I blinked, and Christmas was over. It used to last so much longer when I was a kid.
Our family’s Christmas was very different this year. On my mom’s side of the family, a few family members were missing from the celebration, but the gathering was as rambunctious as ever. On the Talley side, all were present, but it was a bittersweet time. My mamaw is in the advanced stages of Alzheimer’s disease, and on Christmas Eve, my papaw sadly asked us what we thought of moving her to a nursing home. At 82, he just isn’t able to care for her at their home anymore.
Mamaw has been ready to go to heaven for many years now, and when that time comes, of course I’ll miss her, but I won’t be a bit sorry. Her laugh was infectious and the way she ran through the house like Edith Bunker was hilarious. I learned to sing the alto part sitting beside her in church and will always carry a part of her onstage with me. No matter how severely her disease progresses, I will always look at her and see the lady who drove me to and from school every day and sometimes stopped for milkshakes on the way home.
It’s possible that Christmas ’09 was our last one together as the whole family in that house, and that thought is why I’m sitting at my computer trying not to let tears splash down on the keyboard. But with endings come beginnings.
“For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the Lord, “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, to give you hope and a future.” (Jeremiah 29:11)
Letting go and accepting change is hard, but we are never without His grace. There are new memories to be made. The future is bright, and I’m going to celebrate with a milkshake.
I can relate a little bit. My great-grandmother has blockage in her heart we are not sure how much but we know that there is some. I am not as close to my great-grandmother as I would like to be, because when I was younger I hgad a lot of health problems and we could not make the two hour trip as much as we would have liked too, now that I am older there is so many things going on that it is still hard to get over there. I can honestly say that the best memory that I have of her is when The Talley Trio and Kirk Talley came To Texarkana, as happy as it is with her it was the last concert that my sweet Mammie (no blood relation, but that did not matter) was able to attend because just few months later she was called home. I saw my gret-grandmother at Thanksgiving this year and she was not the woman that I remembered, but when we went over there for Christmas I could not believe how miuch she had declined. I am afraid that this might very well be the last Christmas that she will be here for. She is a strong Christian woman who I am blessed to have in my life. As sad as I will be I will keep trusting Christ and I know that when the time comes for me to say goodbye to her it will be more like see ya later.
Lauren, I know the since of loss you must be feeling. I lost my dad’s mom to Alzheimer’s in ‘06, my step mom in May of ‘07, and my dad in Jan ‘08, as well as a host of friends in my church family in between(not all were the same cause). These times we live in are hard and the enemy wants to keep us distracted from our goal of serving God by any means possible.
Thank you for your music and your words of wisdom that you share. It is sad when we loose someone to death but the peace that Jesus gives us believers “passes all understanding”. Therefore, we don’t have to mourn the way the world does, we know that we will see them again in Paradise with Jesus.
Praise the Lord!
I missed seeing you and your mom this summer as I didn’t get to SHSM. But I plan to go this year! See you then or sooner if the Lord wills it. Love , Kitt
PS. I had a lesson w/Debra last time & it was wonderful! Please say Hi for me.
Lauren, I feel the emotions in these tender words you’ve shared. I lost my dad to Alzheimer’s. It’s a long and very sad goodbye. But I’m glad you had this Christmas with her and that you’re assured you’ll spend eternity with her as well. She sounds like a wonderful person – I’ll look forward to meeting her one day too.
Well said Marty
Oh wow I didn’t know that about your dad. You know, there’s this song called “Life Goes On” that really fits here.
As long as we’re doing introductions here…Marty Funderburk is one of the best songwriters in Christian music. He is the writer of “Life Goes On” by the Talley Trio, and he has two cuts on the soon-to-be-released “Songs In The Night.”
Thanks Lauren – but a song without a singer is just words on a page. I can’t wait to hear your new project and read your new book. I love the title, “Songs in the Night.”
Lauren, I know how you feel, I lost my mother this past April and my Dad one week before Thanksgiving, but we know someday we’ll all be able to see our loved ones in heaven someday. Blessings on you and your family as you travel and sing for the Lord. Blessings in the new year 2010.
Jim & Connie Stewart
Lauren, my heart breaks for you and your family. Losing a strong person in the family disables us in a way for a short time, then we think of heaven, our God and his face with the sweetest smile when He decides that it is time to call His loved ones home. “What a day that will be when my Jesus I shall see” says it. The last year my father was alive, he also wanted to be with Jesus. He was tired. He told his doctors that he was ready to go but his children wanted to keep him here on earth. You have such a loving attitude about your grandmother and her in heaven when the time comes. That shows the love you have for her and how wonderful she is in your life. You are blessed with her. May God keep you strong. Diane Guerra, Modesto,Calif.
Lauren, I have many fond memories of all my Grandparents and my parents also. Its so nice to have those memories to draw on when I see their picture and think of our times together whether at the lake or on the farm. I think its something God gives us to hang onto until we are all together again which is the greatest comfort God gives us. Have a blessed new year! The same to your Mom and Dad. Love you and your music! Jan
Lauren, I am glad that you were able to spend this Christmas with your Mamaw. It is never easy to put your loved ones in a nursing home. This will be a very hard thing for your Papaw to do, but he realizes he can’t do it alone anymore.
Life is always full of changes and at times like these it is so hard to see life change. God has a good plan for your Mamw and Papaw. They have been able to have so many good years of married life. What a wonderful example for you and your family. Praying for all of you through these difficult times and the times ahead that will not be easy. Remember the memories and cherish them forever in your heart and mind. God Bless you Lauren.
Bev
Lauren, I met your MaMaw once at the Smokie Mountian Ballpark when Kirk was singing there. She was such a dear lady. She just talked up a storm. My Son-In-Law’s Mother (Evelyn Teague) is a nurse in the Greenville Rehab Center and she had just taken care of you PaPaw when he had the hip surgery. She just talked about Evelyn and appreciated her taking such good care of your PaPaw. I know you will all miss her dearly but just know that she will be with Jesus. I had a dear friend pass away with Alzheimer’s complications in 2007. We miss her so much but know that she is with her husband and Jesus. We are praying for you all. Pam Cook, Arnold, Missouri.
Mamaw always talks up a storm
Thanks for the kind words, Pam..Happy New Year!
Lauren, I am one of your best fans. I love to hear you sing. I don’t think it will be very long until we all go home. On Dec. 13 I got up around 4:00am. I sat in my recliner and I think I dozed off. I knew that the rapture was taking place. I could feel my body shaking and I knew my inner being was being separated from my body. I was trying to talk to the Lord because all of my children aren’t saved but all I could do was just mumble. I don’t dream. But this is so real to me. When I woke up I couldn’t move. I was numb from my head to my toes. The Tv blinked off and on about 5 times. I felt something moving in my body. When it moved out of my hands and my feet I couild move. I felt like something really important happened in that room. I don’t know why I’m telling you this for, but please pray for my lost children, and all the lost people around the world. your best fan. Barbara.
Lauren,
Thank you for sharing that story. The words “they Laaww”, will forever be a part of my vocabulary. I think of both of them so much. Eating, talking, canning, making baskets, going to chuch. All so many wonderfil memories.I’m a better, blessed person, because you, your mom and Dad, along with, Mamaw and Papaw allowed me to be apart of the family.
BECKER!!! What is up?? So glad to hear from you again! We have so many great memories that include you.
Now, I notice you have a new name…when did that happen?
OK for all the rest of you who think I’ve lost it,
Becky was my nanny on the road from 1986-1989. I haven’t seen her or talked to her in several years but The Becker will never die, along with the immortal song “All Boys Have Cooties.”
Hey, you gotta entertain a five year old on a bus somehow!
I’m right there with you! My grandfather turned 77 Christmas eve. I haven’t had as much time with him as I would liked to have had, but I feel even worse beacause my cousins who are younger will never get to play army on his front porch with him like i did 12 years ago!!! It could be very possible that any day could be his last and I really hate it, but I know someday I’ll spend eternity in Heaven with him playing on the front porch of his mansion!!! I am not sure what stage he’s in but he is in no way in the beginning stages! I hope your memories with your mammaw are as great as mine!
Lauren,
Time passes in a hurry so it is best to live like God will be coming for us tomorrow. My Mom died when I was just 21 and my Dad just 5 years later. The diesase that your Granmother makes a mess of lives all around the person who has Alhz. Have worked in Assisted Living Homes for about 10 years and the people with that are so different. It is good to know that she is ready to go home.
We will be praying for her and your family. Have a great new year.
Love,
Becky and Bill Jones
Sorry, about the pain you’re feeling over your grandmother. I understand. My grandma was my best friend and I loved every moment I spent with her. I pray to see her again one day. It’s good to know your mamaw is saved.
Hi Lauren!
I found myself fighting back my own tears as I read this post. Your words match my own thoughts about my “Mimi” (grandmother)
I’ll be praying for her and for you and your family! And I know it is such comfort that you will get to see her again someday!!
Ginger~
Thanks Lauren…….. for puttIng your feelIngs down ….I too had to stop the tears from fallIng whIle readIng and rememberIng my GrannIe….. I also learned alto from her….at church In a small town called Outlaws BrIdge NC … GrannIe and Granddaddy would come brIght and early and wake us up for Santa , every ChrIstmas growIng up [he had always just left our house & was on hIs way to others] Santa Clause of course……….It takes me back to a warmer, sweeter, tIme wIth ALL my famIly together….. I wIll meet them In heaven when It Is my tIme to go..But untIl then, I wIll make new memorIes wIth my own grandchIldren ….Maybe even teach them alto too!!!….God Bless and Thanks for sharIng…..
Yep, it’s amazing to think that someday, if God allows, I will be the Mamaw of the family. And I’m definitely going to teach them to sing alto and take them for milkshakes
God bless!
Lauren, I hope this hymn encourages you, and your family, it has become a favorite of mine.
Be still, my soul; the Lord is on thy side
Bear patiently thy cross of grief or pain.
Leave to thy God to order and provide;
In every change, He faithful will remain.
Be still, my soul; thy best thy heavenly Friend
Through thorny ways leads to joyful end.
Be still, my soul; the hour is hastening on
When we shall be forever with the Lord.
When disappointment, grief and fear are gone,
Sorrow forgot, love’s purest joys restored.
Be still, my soul; when change and tears are past
All safe and blessed we shall meet at last.
If you all could say a prayer for my Dad, he lost his balance and fell in his garage, and broke his hip. ( He is 88 ). He wants to come home so bad. He spent Christmas and will probably spend New Year’s in the hospital. Thank You.
Lauren, that was beautiful. I know, Christmas does fly away much faster as you get older. But, it doesn’t mean that they don’t grow sweeter
I hope you enjoy the days your Grandmother is still with you but I am so happy that she is going to a better place – where she’ll be loved even more 
Thank you for you posts. They are always wonderful and encouraging to read! You have such a beautiful voice and nobody can make certain words sound as pretty as you can!! God bless you, Lauren!
Theresa
i recently lost 3 of my grandparents the in last 2 years, treasure every moment with your grandparents. As I’m sure you do. Your grandma looks like a nice lady. My mamaw is all i got left now, she really needs prayer, she is in such a depression over the lost of my papaw in June of 2008. Her name is Dorothy Scott. I would appreciate your praeyer’s, if you got a minute.
In His Love,Michelle from KY
I do have a minute
And I pray that God comforts Ms. Dorothy and helps her to go on.
I certainly know how you feel. My Mother has Alzheimers disease and it makes Chrismas bittersweet. She has always loved Christmas. We used to watch the Talley Trio Christmas video every year and there was one song on the video about how I wish I could still go to Grandma’s house for Christmas. Well, that always brought tears to our eyes because my Grandma made Christmas for all of us so special. We love that video. You were such a little girl then and have grown up into such a beautiful lady that I know your parents and grandparents are very proud of. One day in heaven we will all be together with no alzheimers,no diseases or pain. May God bless you.
Sandy King
It’s a tough thing to see family members go through things like that. I’ve never had to deal with the altzheimers thing, but I lost all four of my Grandparents in about a one year span, so I do know how tough it can be to see family age and go through health issues. Both my Grandmothers passed first, one from a Stroke, the other from Cancer and my Grandfathers both followed shortly after.I was still in Junior High when they all passed. I often think how much I would love for them to be here now as I get older, but the good thing is I know that I’ll see them again some day. The best thing is to treasure the time you have with your family while you have it. I seen so many good people that have passed way too young for their age, and many that have lived long full lives. I know I’ve come very close to death on more than one occaision due to near accidents, but I guess it wasn’t my time yet. Life is so short so make the most of it while you’re here and treasure the time you have with your family. Your Grandparents sound like good Godly people Lauren so even though things are sorrowful now there will be a day when you get to see Grandmother in a new body free of Altheimers. Take care!
Sam Kerfoot
Dear Lauren;
What a beautiful compliment to your Grandmaw.She must love you dearly.
I have a Mother-in-Law that is so dear to me. She is the best Mom that anyone could have. She is 101 years old..Still gets around pretty good, but she is loosing her memory. Can not remember her Grand children.
You may have met her at Walkerville Mi in November.
Love your stories and your singing.
Best Wishes for the New Year
Don
My mamaw has not been able to speak for several years now. The only sentence that sometimes comes out coherently is “I love you.”
I think I did meet your mother-in-law in Walkerville. I hope I’m still living well like she is if I make it that long!
You know in 2007,..i almost lost my Dad!,.with his kidneys functioning at 15% and his liver at 30% and his heart not pumping the best.And my Mom who had 2 heart attacks could no longer take care of him, so he is in his new home,..a nursing home,..but through it all, my Dad is ready for his new home in heaven when the Lord will call him home. But , i guess the Lord is not ready to call him home yet!,..this year he celebrated his 89th birthday,..and we had wonderful Christmas with him. Yes we serve a awesome God,..and my dad can say as David said in Psalm 121:1and 2,..I will lift up mine eyes unto the hills, from whence cometh my help. My help cometh from the Lord, which made heaven and earth. And we can say “O Give thanks unto the Lord; for he is good: because his mercy endureth forever, Psalm 118:1
Merry Christmas Lauren!
Lauren, my wife’s “Nanny” from Cleveland, TN use to say “they Laaww” all the time and I didn’t know what she meant until I read somewhere that that meant “the Lord”. Nanny and her husband, Charles Burchfield (PaPaw) were quite the couple. He would get cranky and she would put him in his place after tolerating just about enough of it “to spit”, then he would mellow out again and know that “if Momma ain’t happy, ain’t nobody happy”! Sadly, Nanny passed away a day after we got married and then PaPaw passed eleven months later, more from a broken heart than the cancer that traveled from his prostate to his bones. Sweet and dear people that we both miss dearly.
An old boss of mine said that our bodies are out-lasting our minds these days as medical science and better nutrition have increased our longevity. The quality of this extended life seems to have suffered in the balance.
God bless you and your family as you head into a new decade. Don’t forget to give Brother Dean a big hug from us; we miss him after we moved to Charleston and he moved to Morristown from Jonesboro First Baptist.
Blessings, John and Tona DiTore
Bro. Dean preached a good sermon yesterday!
Your wife’s grandparents sound just like mine. Mamaw also used to say “L. A. Lawwww” when she was surprised or flabbergasted. I doubt she ever knew that was a TV show
Thank you, Lauren, for your perspective. I lost my 84 year old father on the 20th of December. I got his ashes back on Christmas Eve. I seemed so strange not having him in the house and as I opened the container my thought was, “this is what my dad’s life is reduced to; a pile of ashes”. Of course that is nonsense. He was ready to meet Jesus.
Lauren,
I certainly feel your pain in the words you wrote. My grandma passed 10 yrs ago and I still miss her. She died from cancer. My paw paw died on July 4 2006, so that holiday is somewhat bittersweet now. It’s hard to see them suffer, and even harder to see them go. But we’re reassured that we know where there going. At Christmas, we would always go to their house in the mountains. Now they’re in heaven, and I miss going up there. It just isn’t the same. We would have to eat in 30 min shifts, seeing there were so many. And one of my mom’s sisters has passed recently from that awful disease, and it seems so surreal sometimes. But one day I’ll see them all again. …Trying not to cry here… They had so much move to give and never ran out. Have a milkshake on me… I know the pain you feel in your heart, only Jesus can heal that pain. God Bless.
Stephen
Dear Lauren,
First of all, let me say, I love your Site! You are so very tender and I thank you for sharing your MaMaw story…. it breaks my heart when people have to struggle with this disease. You know, you may have already heard it, but, an amazing song, sung by Sheri Easter about her grandmother says something like…. in heaven, she’ll remember….. I’ll have to research to remember the song… but, I will share it with you…. I just sent her an email, asking her for the title, and I’ll share it with you when she replies….
Secondly, let me say, I am so very impressed with the launch of your own website! It’s so “Fresh” and exciting! I’m so excited to read your book when his released… I’ll have to start hunting for it!!!! You have a wonderful spirit and you are an inspiration to so many people! Keep doing what you do!!!
Hugs, Cindy Allison (Senioa, GA)….
Thanks darlin! You won’t have to hunt for the book…you’ll be able to order it right here and have it delivered to your door. Looking forward to seeing you and Ron on the cruise. We’ll have a big time.
Lauren,
As I read your words tonight my heart cries for you and your family. Through the years as I have listened to all of the Talleys I know how much each of you love your grandparents. I cannot help but let my heart cry go out to your pawpa having to make such a decision; knowing how difficult that must have been for him and how wonderful that your Dad and Kirk let him reach it in his own time. On Christmas Day I turned 73 and I am at the age where my husband and I think on those decisions that we might have to make down the road. We do not know what we might face but we know that with God’s help we will make the right one. Please know that each of you will be in our prayers in these difficult days ahead.
I received a birthday card from my 16 year old grandaughter this week that made me know that she was remembering my role in her life and her love for me. Sometimes we think the teenagers forget, at least for a moment, so I was so happy to receive that card.
I will remember your cries of pain and this grandmother says, “Go ahead and have a good cry!”
Love and Prayers,
Barbara
Love You Lauren- Thanks for sharing. God bless.
Lauren
i read your letter i know how you feel in 2002 i went to BC to visit my aunt she had Alzheimers it was hard to see she did not no who i was our family’s were close my aunt is in heaven now my dad passed away before christmas in 2001 my parents are both in heaven really miss them alot we have the hope that we will see our loved one again in heaven thanks for sharing this Lauren what was heavy on your heart ill be praying for you and your family
Hugs, Terry
GOD BLESS YOU YOU ARE TRULY A VERY SPECIAL PERSON.
Lauren,
So sorry to hear about your grandmother. I will be praying for you all. I have a good friend who’s mom had this disease. It is very hard, but with God’s grace you will be able to weather this storm. I’m not sure if you remember who I am, but my family of eight children and I always come to your concerts in houston at Sagemont. Well, this year I was diagnosed with breast cancer. It is not the common type and what I have is still in the experimental stage. Anyway, I say all that to just encourage you in the Lord. When I got this news, i could choose to do one of two things. That was to look at this through God;s eyes or through human eyes. Humanly I would be afraid and be discouraged, not knowing what the outcome may bring. But through God;s eyes I have all the hope in the world, for I know He is in control and He will have the ultimate outcome. He allows trials in our lives to draw us closer to Him, He is waiting to wrap His big arms around you when you need Him. He will make your family stronger through this time and He will use this to be a witness for His glory. I know you already know all this, but there will be some tough times ahead. Just remember to keep your eyes on the Lord and seek His will through this. He will never leave you and He will be ready and waiting to wrap you in His arms and hold you. We serve an awesome God who is daily pouring His grace on us, if we just let Him. Love you girl. Can’t wait to see you all in January. Know that I will be praying for you and your family daily. : ) Michelle
Lauren,
Just wanted to say that I admire you…..You’ve been able to spend the golden years with your grandparents…I never knew my grandparents on my mom’s side of the family. On my Dad’s side, my grandpa had already passed on when I was born. We only got to see my grandma once or twice a year, due to her living over 12 hrs away.
I now see what I’ve missed through my 2 children’s eyes. My son, Zach is 10 & he only got to be with my dad for almost his first 2 years before my dad passed away & he never got to meet my mom. When I see kids that have both sets of their grandparents still living, it makes me envious. I know that being that way is a sin, but I hurt for my kids, not having grandparents around to do fun things with & go to restaurants with knowing they can get away with almost anything!!!LOL On the other end of the spectrum, it’s very hard to watch someone that you love get to a point where they don’t know your name. It comes to a place where you almost have to just let go & let God decide where he wants them to be…….
. I never got the chance to meet my dad’s parents my grandma taylor died before I was born as I was the last grandchild, my mom named me after her so my first name is Pearl, ( don’t laugh) so you see why I go by my middle name. grand pa taylor died when I was a baby,but he was proud I was named Pearl.
my mom’s dad died when I was 5,I remember him getting me to drink Dr.Pepper.
but my mom’s mom was my hero she was a small lady but as my mom would tell me mamie would take her 6 ft brothers down! I loved her so much and loved being around her,we all would go to her house on christmas eve,never missing a one all her grand,great grand and great-great-grandchildren would be there.I named my daughter nancy after her. I still miss her so much,but I remember all the fun times we had. she was there when my children were born.when she died from a stroke I felt my heart had been ripped out,I knew she was in heaven,I knew her pain was gone and she was happy,but my pain was a long time leaving. my heart goes out to your family,but to your pawpa this diease has taken away his life partner his best friend,I can feel in my heart for him how hard it was to make this decision I will be faceing this decision in the near future about my husband. at 56 he has been diagnose with dementia the Doctors can’t give a reason by the front of his brain looks like a 70 yr old, that’s why he never comes with me to see ya’ll. crowds make him feel trap, and he would not remember being there. I know this has been long please forgive me,
I will always keep you and your family in my heart.
love you all louise
Even I had a darling granny who jus passed away . Grandmothers are the sweetest people on earth . They go all out jus to make us happy. I thank God for giving me a granny even if it were only for a few years.
Hi Lauren,
Just wanted to let you know that we have recently been listening to your wonderful CD’s and DVD’s after first seeing you on some Gaither Music DVD’s. We love the beautiful songs that you have chosen to sing and the way you express them in a way that reveals your depth of faith and genuine love for the Lord. We are hoping that you will be considering a trip to Australia one of these days, and would love to have you visit our little church on the outskirts of Sydney if you have the time. May God continue to bless you and your whole family and we send our best wishes to your Mamaw. Did you enjoy your milkshake?
Love from Nick and Inika Kroh
Lauren,
Thank you for your music and for using the talent God has blessed you with for His Glory!
Thank you for sharing. My grandfather passed away several years ago from Alzheimer’s. He lived in Arkansas. I have wonderful memories of him – we spent all my childhood Christmases there with he and my Nanny. I remember swinging on the big swing on the front porch with my cousins and the big red Christmas bulbs that lined their house each year. After Christmas dinner we would all play cards and he and my uncle would get out the instruments – my grandfather played the harmonica, my uncle the guitar. My PawPaw would try to play the harmonica without losing his dentures! LOL! He had been sick for several years before he passed and I was already an adult with children of my own. I remember the last Christmas he was alive we decided to go spend it with Nanny & PawPaw. My PawPaw carried around a little book with everyone’s name in it because he couldn’t remember. But that Christmas his mind was a clear as crystal. He knew us, he laughed, he joked around with everyone. I didn’t realize that was the last Christmas we would spend together here on this earth, but I was so thankful that God allowed his mind to clear for just a little while. My daughter loves to hear your MawMaw sing on your video “God is great, God is good, God is merciful”. That same God who surely is great, surely is good, and surely is merciful will be so real to you during this difficult time in your life. Everything you have ever told audiences about God, every song you’ve ever sung about Him being everything you need – it’s all true and He will be faithful and He will be your Comforter. I have been a HUGE Talleys fan since the first time I saw them at Watermelon Park in Berryville, VA many moons ago
I don’t know how to express my appreciation for your willingness to allow God’s grace to shine thru you in such a way as to lift others up. You have made my heart lighter and my day brighter.
Thank you.
thank you for the news about your mamaw those are good things to remember.i’ve got some good memorys about my grandparents.
do you and your parents still live in whitesburg.
Lauren, As usual you give us all such great memories. My grandma Georgie was my best friend. I miss her so much,but as most of us we will seethem again! I cant wait! Please take a fewe minutes and send up a prayer for my grand daughter Marissa. She is 8 yrs old and has Juenes sydrome since birth. Has went through 15 surgeries since birth. Is due for another but hda to cancel because she got phnemonia, and now SARS , Carona virus. She is in ICU on a ventilator and heavily sedated. Because of mursa setin we cant go in to see here.We are in Mississippi and she is in SAn Antonio. She is Gods little Angel and Miracle. Please all that read send up a prayer for her and her doctors,as I will pray for all of you and your families for great health this New Year if God Wills. Keep up the great work Lauren . Thjs website is AWESOME plus love the music.. Julie Slone
Thanks for sharing with us Lauren! You have a gift of putting your feelings into words. I lost my dad 3 years ago and believe me….once your Mamaw gets Home, you will never think of Heaven the same way again. It just makes it so much more personal. Can’t wait to gather at the river!
Lauren,
My heart goes out to you about your Grandma. I lost mine last year. I, like you will, miss her terribly but I know that she is in heaven waiting for me. I cherish the many memories every day that I have of her and will never forget her. Just remember that and it will get you through.
Lauren,
Thanks for sharing your heart and story with us. My best friend is 48 years old and is terminal. I too understand all to well what your family is experiencing. The doctors have told her she’s got months after batteling throat cancer.
Well, we’ve prayed her through her 48th Birthday, and we prayed her through Christmas. It hurts so much to know that it was her last Christmas with her two boys and husband. However, just like you said, when that time comes I will be quite overwhelmed with sadness, but joy will quickly present itself as I know she’ll be in the presence of the One whom she love the most! Knowing 100% for sure that Heaven is Sharon’s etenal home gives me comfort these days.
In your Mamaw’s case, enjoy the moment’s you have with her, make some memories, and in the end when Jesus calls her home I want you to paint this picture in your mind: Jesus himself will stand to Welcome her home, she’ll have won the ultimate prize! She’ll hear the words she’s longed for Welcome Home! She’ll be praising her King for eternity and that alone will make your journey and mine with Sharon a little easier.
By the way, lately I’ve been listening lots to My Hope is in the Lord. It gives me comfort these difficult days with Sharon. So thank you for that song that keeps me from breaking down into tears less often these days as my best friend prepares to go Home.
Be blessed!
Love in Christ,
Alicia
Roark
Hey Lauren,
I’m sorry to hear about your Mamaw. My Mom was diagnosed with Alzheimers about four years ago. Like your grandfather, my Dad is determined to care for her in their home until he is physically incapable to do so.
This horrible disease truly is the ‘long and sad goodbye’. Each gathering is bittersweet. In spite of yourself, you look for recognition in eyes that don’t know anyone. You try to give comfort but she only wants to go ‘home’. You listen for the laugh and the familiar note in her voice when she talks to you, but it’s not there anymore.
My Mom loved the Lord since she was a little girl, but for her, I think home means more than Heaven and Jesus. Imagine always feeling like a stranger, in unknown surroundings, where no one knows you or misses you or thinks about you. She just wants to be in a place that feels like home.
When she reaches Heaven, I know Mom will be home and will be with many who have reached the Shore before her. And maybe she will meet your Mamaw. And they can laugh together.
Yeah. I’m sorry to hear that about your grandmother. My grandmother passed away on Christmas of 07 and I miss her very much. The song “Life Goes On” has helped me deal with her loss a lot better cause I know where she’s at. There’s a song by the Isaacs that helps me too called “Through the Valley”. But I love your music.
Lauren,
It’s been about 5- yrs. since I’ve seen ‘any’ of The Talleys… Well, have had some severe ‘health-issues’ myself, but PTL, He isn’t finished with me yet….?
I was fortunate to get to meet your sweet grandmother & grandfather @ a Singing in Pigeon Forge, TN…. on or about July of 2004…? They are very sweet & friendly people to. ( I have a picture taken with them to.) Well, have some of you, your Mom & Dad, & of course have many, many of Uncle Kirk (Curt) too.. We still LUV him too……..
Well, I can say that I know what you, & your family are going through because ‘We’ had our Mama to have that ‘mind-stealing’ disase to. My Mama went to Heaven on Sept. 17, 2006 AND it was the Alzhemizer’s that she died from @ age 89.. she had this for eight years that we were aware of.We finally had to have her go into a Nursing Home to, but I went to see her everyday up untill she went into the hospital & we all took turns ’sitting’ with her, she went to my sister’s for the last 4-weeks that she lived with Hospice helping us with our Mom.. So, we our family really do know the ’shoes’ you & your family are walking in AND I’ve prayed for your MawMaw for a long time since July of 2003 when Kirk told me in Jackson, TN that she had Alzhemier’s, We also give to the AZH. Fund each year in Knoxville, TN too… May God bless Your MawMaw & all of The Talleys is my ‘Special Prayer’. I truly LUV all of you too. Mary ” RoseLady of S. G. Music” Mary G.
I know how you feel Lauren. This year was the first time in many years my mom came to my house for Christmas and I know it will be her last. Her health is declining and she has a hard time getting around in order to get into my house so it was a real challenge for me and my two sisters but after almost an hour we finally got her settled. It’s hard to see them get to that stage in their life but I’m thankful it worked out this year that she could come. I took lots of pictures so those are memories I’ll have forever!!
hey Lauren I can understand my grandma has Alzheimers too and I can remember those special memeries She was the one who help me grow closer to god when i was little and I will diffently miss her when she is gone I have live 15 years with her while my parents work and I will be hard to let her go I feel that her time is short the best part of it is that she will be with Jesus and Her memeries will be in my heart. that is the same for you your grandmas memeries will always be in your heart for you to look back at.
Lauren I know how hard it is to see a loved one go thru such a horrible illness as I to had to watch my mother go thru several years on suffering with complications from diabetes. They are very ugly diseases to deal with. It was almost wrong to say but the evening the Lord took my mother home was a joyful moment for me as I knew my mother suuffered no more. She once again was able to see and to walk and sew and knit as she did for many years.
On another note is Marty Funderburk related to Jason of the quartet Driven?? I think his last name is Funderburk. If so I know where he gets his talents from.
Thanks for all that you do for futhering the word of our lord and savior. You are a very special and blessed person.
Marty Funderburk and Jason Funderburk are not related…but Jason does have another very talented relative.
Jason’s dad is Danny Funderburk, former tenor for the Cathedral Quartet.
Lauren. It’s hard to face the realities of an illness like this one. Moments of lucid awareness become lesser, leaving loved ones to recall memories instead, but how wonderful to have those memories of time spent with your grandmother. God is setting the stage to welcome her into his arms, something she has livd towards for so long. I’ve seen your grandmother with Kirk years back at Dollywood and at a few of his concerts. Her smile was always ready and the love she had for Kirk, so plainly evident on her face. A look I bet she has whenever she is around those dear to her heart.
It’s not hard to understand why her time here on earth is shorter, I’m sure God waits in great anticipation to welcome her home.
Cherish each moment, hold each memory, and never forget how blessed you are that God put that special lady in your life. So many would love to say they had a grandmother such as yours. Remember also that I don’t know you personally, you are in my thoughts and I love you.
HI LAUREN THIS COULDN’T HAVE COME AT A BETTER TIME FOR ME . MY SISTER AND I JUST THIS MORNING MADE PLANS TO VISIT SOME NURSING HOMES TOMORROW , YOU SEE OUR MOTHER ALSO HAS ALZHEIMERS . MY SISTER AND I HAVE BEEN TRYING TO KEEP HER HOME AS LONG A POSSIBLE , BUT THE TIME HAS COME THAT IT IS TOO HARD ON OUR FAMLIES. THE HEARTBREAK OF SEEING SOMEONE THAT YOU LOVE MIND WITHER AWAY IS VERY DEPRESSING .OUR MOM IS A GREAT CHILD OF GOD , AND HAS BEEN A WONDERFUL MOM .i HAVE PRAYED THAT GOD WOULD JUST TAKE HER HOME AND I KNOW THAT THI S IS SELFISH ON MY PART . WE ALL NEED TO PRAY AND ASK GOD FOR A CURE FOR THIS TERRIBLE THING . lAUREN I WILL KEEP YOUR FAMILY IN MY PRAYERS AND WHEN YOU HAVE DOME THIM PLEASE REMEMBER US AS WE EMBARQ ON THIS JOURNEY. MAY GOD BLESS YOU AND YOYR FAMILY .
I don’t consider that a selfish wish, for the Lord to take your mom on home. If she’s ready to go, then I think it’s actually quite loving for you to be willing to let her go.
God knows how hard this is for you, and He is gracious enough to spare you pain and her further decline, if it’s His will. He is also gracious enough to walk with you and her throughout the duration of this disease. His ways are higher than our ways, and like I wrote earlier, we’re never without His grace. God bless you.
THANK YOU LAUREN FOR TAKING THE TIME GIVE ME SOME UPLIFTING THOUGHTS . IT REALLY HELPS . AN I KNOW THAT MY MOM IS READY TO GO HOME , AND HAS BEEN A CHILD OF GOD FOR MANY MANY YEARS GOD BLESS YOU
Hi Lauren – It is so hard to watch our loved ones fade away. I’ve lost all my grandparents and parents, so the Holidays, while nice, always include some bittersweet moments. We expect to outlive our parents and grandparents, but I found that I was still totally unprepared for each passing. I found that the emotional pain of losing a loved one is physically painful. I discovered that many people expect you to “get over it”, but I learned that you never get over it. You learn to live with it, but life is different from that point on. I’ve learned that just when you think you’ve learned to live with the loss, something will happen that brings back a memory and the pain of that loss washes over me all over again. I am fortunate that I am part of a legacy of believers. So when I am sad because I miss them, I remember to think toward the future to the day when there will be no more pain and sorrow. And I try to imagine how wonderful it will be to be reunited with my family and friends who have gone before me. Then I get so excited, I just can’t wait! God bless you!
I have never lost a family member and I’m not sure how I’ll deal with that when it comes. But I know that painful circumstances change us. It’s up to us if they change us for the better or for worse. In the worst times of my life God reminded me that tough times are used for our good, and we can go on with His grace. Thanks for sharing your story.
Lauren, I was recently at your Christmas concert on your birthday and I was your age when my grandmother was in a nursing home in CA, we were so close my grandma took care of me throughout my childhood and we remained close. (Not all grandchildren are able to spend their time with their grandma but I was blessed to have that relationship). When she got Altzheimer’s I wasn’t sure I could handle it because not until you are experiencing it do you know what you can deal with. God commited me to a very difficult situation that will always be a reminder of how a love can never be changed no matter how difficult it seems. My grandmother died in 1994, so it’s been a loss of 15 years. Her love for God was so paramount in my life. He also provided me an opportunity to be able to see my grandmother in the hospital that was on my way to work, so I stopped to visit my grandmother every chance before work even if she wasn’t aware of my prescence at the time (but only God knows for sure) even now I cry but never regretful of all the amazing memories I will carry for such a remarkable influence in my life. God is forever faithful. Words cannot express the joy I feel today for such unforgetable memories. That all the sadness cannot be taken too deep, before I smile at the blessings that I can count in my lifetime and pray I will be able to someday be like that for others. Your memories will always remind you of the blessings that you will carry throughout your life, because you have stories to tell and carry on.
You and your grandma have a special relationship, I know God is blessing you at this difficult time. I will pray for all of your family.
Lauren, I can totally relate to how hard it is to loose a grandmother. I had two of the
best grandmothers growing up and they were both very influental in my walk with
the Lord. Both of them are now in Heaven with Jesus and I am so happy for them.
My husband lost his grandmother in May of 2009. She was 93 yrs old and a
godly christian lady. It was hard for all of us and the family, we miss her, but
the memories we carry with us everyday. God Bless you Lauren, hang in there
and lean on the Lord.
Much Love,
Kim
hey Lauren,
my dad went Home Oct 12 this year. So, it was our first Christmas w/out him. Yep…we had to put him in a nursing home this year in June, too. Very tough. But, he is home now & had the greatest Christmas I know. Can you picture being at the bday party of Jesus for real?! Wow! But, gotta say my heart sure missed him. And, like you said, it is hard to see w/the tears that fill my eyes b/c I sure love him so much. I miss him & his hugs & smiles. He, like your mawmaw, taught me to sing alto, too. He played the piano like crazy, shaped notes & by ear really! My shoe buckles scrapes are still on the piano bench where I would sit next to him & sing while he played. Wow…You & me are blessed, though, cause one day, we will be singing together at the greatest bday party ever w/them when we all get there! You are so sweet Lauren. Take care & talk w/you sometime again..
Small world…my grandparents taught singing schools and attended every shaped-note singing convention they could get to.
Dear Lauren,
i will try to express what’s in my heart, as my sympathies pour out to you.
almost every one of us has, at one time or another, suffered through a grieving period for a loved one who has passed or is slowly slipping away. even with complete faith and trust in God and His saving grace; at times, one’s own grief can seem tragic and incomprehensible. after all, even being in the Lord, we are still human.
i think its precious and wonderful to see that you have so many loving and caring friends in Christ who are sending and sharing their thoughts, feelings, and prayers during your sorrow. along with our Lord, we need to know that people care too.
but the grief that burdens you now is something very, very personal, and quite unique. in that regard, its similar to our own relationship with God; very personal. i know that while its impossible for me to know and understand the depths of your private pain; i DO know that God and His love is always with you and is surrounding you, even now. God understands your grief, and He cares. I believe its His plan to allow you to grieve; to release those human emotions that grip you.
Lauren, i know you are strong, but dont be afraid to cry. dont be afraid to let your emotions come to the surface and bubble over. God has purposely given us a caring heart to love with, and to grieve with… he has allowed us a special relief valve to free up our pain, and let it out. its the heavenly medicine that He has prescribed for His children.
Lauren, just know this. like the Lord,,,,,
~ i care ~
Mike
oh yeah…. even at 2am, a chocolote shake would go good about right now : )
Dear Lauren and Mrs. Talley:
We lost our mother last year, Christmas Day 2008. Many expressed to us how said! All we could say was that this was not a sad thing on Christmas Day, but an honor by my Mother’s Lord to take her on such a special day.
Yes. we missed her greatly this Christmas, but she is having a way better Christmas than last year–Amen?! She did not have alzheimer’s. but COPD and we had no idea she would have a stroke right before Christmas and be gone, just like that–but also, so quickly to God. Praise HIM….
We so enjoyed seeing you in the Cumberland/Prospect, Virginia Area and we look forward to seeing you in January 2010 in Cumberland, VA. My sister talked to your MOM at last year’s concert since my MOM had just passed and she was SO comforting to us–just like God would have wanted. (My Mom’s name was Edith.)
God bless you all and have safe travels to you all!! You have and will be in our prayers…..P.S. We love “Orphans of God”, PLEASE sing it…..
Johnna,
We will be in Cumberland January 2- hope to see you!
Lauren, I lost my MeeMaw eight years ago. She had cancer in her brain. She had been sick for a while before they found out what it was. The doctor’s diagnosed it on a Thursday and she died that Tuesday. I was only eleven at the time. I knew she was very sick, but I didn’t want her to leave me. She was the BEST MeeMaw ever. I still miss her alot. But I know that she’s in a better place, and I can hardly wate to see her again in Heaven some day. I’ll be praying for you and your family as ya’ll are going though this hard time.
Thank you Lauren for the heart-felt messages you post. Gets all of us to remembering…lost my dad after a 3-year battle (he’d taken care of mom for 30 years after a tragic car accident where a drunk driver hit them head-on). When dad passed I assumed the role of primary caregiver. Mom went to heaven nine years ago…I still miss both of them so much. P.S. Johnna, my mom’s name was Edith but she changed it to Edythe (as a teenager she considered herself “star” material!)
It’s amazing that so many folks are feeling the same emotions and in a way, it’s also comforting. I lost my grandma too, to cancer a few years ago. I still miss her, but like you, Lauren, I have great memories and she taught me many wonderful lessons that have and will help me in life! It’s funny how something coming from a grandma means so much more than if it’s coming from parents. lol It was that way for me anyway. Thanks for sharing your heart with us, Lauren. Sounds like God blessed you with a wonderful Mawmaw and a great voice!
Hi Lauren,
I know I already commented on this post, But I have been wanting to share something with you. I thought you would enjoy. We were able to see you guys for the second time this past October in CT. We had such fun at the concert. One of the highlights for me is when you and your mom held my baby brother Jeremy.
Well, my sister Carole and I realized not to long after that concert whenever we played a talley song (Mostly when you have solo in it) He will calm right down. Whenever he hears your voice he calms it never fails. It’s quite funny! He happens to love “Realms Of Glory Bright!”
Well, I just had to share!!
Ginger~
Hi Lauren. Thank you for sharing your heart. Your grandparents were always so sweet to us and I know how dear they are to you. I will continue to pray for you all. This year was hard for us because we lost Memaw in June. She was my great grandma – the one who kept Chad and I after school and during the summer. Anyway, it was hard to Celebrate Christmas without her. Somehow, her place at the “old people” table was left empty this year. And her picture was all over the family calendar that we give to each other. Gone, but not forgotten. There is such joy in knowing that she’s in Heaven. I really don’t know how people without that hope can face aging and death. As for me, I still find myself praying a little differently. I’m sure that God must understand why I ask Him to tell Memaw I said hello…Wendy
I know how you feel. My Mamaw and Papaw Talley died many years ago. My father, Willis Ray Talley died in 1995 and my mother, Catherine Talley, died in 2003. Then, on December 28, 2008, my wife, Gloria Talley, died. Finally, my 39 year old son, Larry Talley II (Bubber) died in a car crash November 22, 2009. I am lost without them. I know they were all ready to go, and I have that blessed hope that I will see them again, but there is a lot of pain and the holidays will NEVER be the same again. Enjoy the time you have now and make the best memories. They will be very precious later. God bless you. Your music is the best!!
Lauren,
I live in NC and I have seen you and your family twice. I have several of your CDs and I want to tell you that they have been a big blessing to me. In November or 1995, I lost my mama unexpectedly and then I lost my dad May of 1996 to lung cancer.
My mama and I were real close and I was the oldest of three. I was 25 with a 4 year old. Since then, my husband and I have had three other children. Sometimes it really aches my heart that they didn’t get to know her, but I know she is with the Lord. I miss my dad as well and I have had a hard time dealing with the lost of my parents.
I know that it has been over a decade, but I never really grieved properly because I immediately had to start taking care of my 15 year old sister and my brother- not to mention my 4 year old. My husband has been great, but every year, around November, I would begin to feel that spirit of depression come on.
After purchasing your CD, “Fife Goes On” when I saw you at Smyrna Church in NC, I was listening to the title song, “Life Goes On.” That was such a breakthrough moment. It finally hit me that life does indeed go on and I will be reunited with my parents one day. Not only will that be a great reunion, but it will be perfect with no more pain. I knew this all along, but the words to that song permiated my spirit and brought healing to my soul.
Thanks to you and your family for giving the Lord you voices. His annointing is truly on your music.
May god richly bless you and your family,
Dawn
Lauren,
This was a very touching story that reminds me of my last Christmas with my grandma, which was in the nursing home. I remeber when she got to where she wasn’t able to clearly talk, and it was hard for her to utter anything, the phrase “I love you” was always easy and understandble for her. A Grandma’s love was always clear. I never doubted, or questioned if she loved me, I always knew that. I first learned about Jesus as a very young child from my Grandma, and growing up through life she was always the one I would go to if I needed to know what to do, and she always knew a scripture that pretained to anything I would be going through. I still miss her, especially around holidays, but I know she is at the place she always talked about longing to be, and that’s at the feet of her Savior Jesus Christ, and I wouldn’t bring her away from that for anything. I just can’t wait to see her again one day. Ashley and I love you, and are thankful for your friendship, and the ministry you provide to the masses and we pray that God will continue to bless you and the family. I hope we see you soon, and Happy New Year!
~ Neil (aka Frankie, hehe)
Lauren, it is sad to hear of the condition of your grandmother. I remember your grandparents from when I was about 8 years old and my parents took me to a singing school at Shady Grove. Your grandmother was an inspiration to me and was always so pleasant. I remember your grandfather encouraging all of the children to learn as much as they possibly could about shaped-note singing. These are good memories. Also, they sang in a quartet with Mildred and Kyle Talley who also attended Shady Grove. I am now married to their oldest son, Bobby. I’ve said all of that to say Cornie and Red (as I know them) have truly been a blessing to so many people and have sown seeds not only in their family’s lives but in the lives of many, many other people as well. Also remember that when we say our goodbyes here on this earth, if we have made the right choices, God will give a special peace to those left behind and we have the comfort in knowing that we will meet again. I will be keeping you and your family in my thoughts and prayers.
Lauren,
This post is absolutely precious. I see you growing as a writer and as an amazing woman of God, and I am proud to call you friend.
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This story about your mamaw was so touching! I too learned so many things about singing from my grandmother! Lauren, I just wanted you to know that you inspire me! I have always been a talley trio fan, but the first time I heard you sing His Life For MIne I was blown away by you! That song is so powerful! I sing it in my church and I live in a small town so not many people have heard it before, so I am so glad that you guys put a song out like that, it has touched so many lives in my path! It is my signature song, I could sing it every Sunday!
Thank you for the ministry you have and I thank God for you!
Dear Lauren & Family,
(( We have been getting Newsletter’s from Kirk about your MawMaw, we are still praying for ALL of The Talleys too. May God bless all of you in everything))..
Well, it’s been some time since I wrote the other comment, but have had MORE health issues like COPD ‘ No, never smoked’-has progressed more in the past year, had tests ran Thurs. 03/4th. & Friday had the P A D test done on my arteries…Well, have ‘blockages in ‘both legs’, heart, & brain too. (IF anyone has seen the Plavix AD on TV) except it is blockages is in my “Arteries” not blodclots !
Pray for me, as all of this is serious for me, Because they can’t put any Contrast Dye in me for any surgery of any kind, nor use it for thr tests they would need to do to find where those blockages are located in me…( I would die from the Dye, allergic big time to any dye…